Monday, August 21, 2017

rose: our double bed has felt a little cramped these days when the two junior lorimers get into bed with us. so it was time to upgrade to a queen. we've talked before about wanting to get a mattress with a pillow top, so that's what we got. it got delivered today. it's quite the change. wide-wise the difference is noticeable but fine; but length-wise, it's a bit of an adjustment visually.

thorn: (which starts with a rose) today, eamon was completely content to play in the backyard by himself. this is a big deal, especially because just hanging around the house on a monday used to be quite a trial. but we didn't really have a choice, because we were waiting for the mattress to be delivered. i was surprised and delighted when he was happy to just play by himself. i even got to have a shower while he was outside and otis waited in the crib (quite patiently i must add). however, eamon's play was rather messy. he was pretending to lay new cement with wet sand, and so on. so before brendan got home, i got in quite a panic that he was going to be cross. brendan is objectively uptight about mess. and he particularly doesn't like it when eamon moves the sand outside the sandbox. i was rushing to get the sand back in the box, and trying to get through to eamon that his daddy was going to be very mad, when brendan showed up. i was anxious. he handled it calmly at the time, but later reached his limit and called for a moratorium on the sandbox. which results in a fight between us, because i was just happy that eamon was playing creatively by himself, and i was willing to endure the mess for the peace and his fun. we still haven't resolved it. we hit the pause button at dinner time and we'll end up getting back to it later. but i don't know how we will reach an agreement about this. thankfully we're pretty good at setting aside an argument until we find an appropriate time to talk about it.

Sunday, August 20, 2017

rose: i just spent two days doing a first aid course. i aced the test, which was nice, and i learned some useful stuff. but my favourite part was getting to read during the lunch and break times. i'm also very grateful that otis did really well. that was the longest time we've ever been apart (8 hours, then 6 hours), and for the most part, he didn't notice. although today, he cried when he saw me, which probably means he did miss me.

thorn: i made a bit of a mess while repainting the floor in our downstairs kitchen. not too much, but enough. it was just bad timing because b needed me to take care of otis so he could make dinner. it can be challenging trying to get anything else done while parenting.

Friday, August 18, 2017

rose: when we lived on york street, i loved loved loved my balcony. i would regularly tell people that it was my favourite place in the world. when we bought our house on brant, we didn't go out looking for a house with a front porch, but i love that we got one that has one. especially a front porch that is covered and shady.

thorn: i've heard before, that no matter how big your space, people will fill it. when we lived on main street, our living quarters were small. and our house now (with our basement) is three times the size of that. and yet, it gets messy all the time, and feels cluttered. i need to get rid of some stuff. it's all the little things that fill it up.

Thursday, August 17, 2017

rose: i don't do well with things that i HAVE to do. i usually resent things that i'm obligated to do, even things that i do voluntarily. generally, my instincts are to shirk routine. so i really, really enjoyed lying in bed reading my book this morning while eamon was at VBC and otis napped. it's especially liberating to be finished my ambitious handcraft project. it's all books and harry potter cross-stitch for the foreseeable future.

thorn: parenting feels heavy lately. heavy in the way that something feels when you've been carrying it for a while and you've grown tired. we're "on vacation" this week, but vacations aren't what they used to be. i long for rest. i suppose sleep is a good place to start.

Monday, August 14, 2017

rose: we enrolled eamon in the VBC that my sister runs. she puts a lot of time, energy and heart into the whole thing, and while it's not really our cup of tea, i felt i needed to send him to it. brendan has this week off of work, so it'll be nice to have our mornings relaxing at home. and that's just what we did. i got a new novel from the library and sat out on the front porch reading while otis napped.

thorn: do-it-yourself projects are a powder cake for brendan and i. we don't communicate well, and i get easily frustrated. i find it difficult because i have the desire, but limited skills. meanwhile, brendan has the skills and no desire. so i have to coax him into helping me, and usually it goes badly. even for something small the the project we tried to undertake today.

Saturday, August 12, 2017

thursday rose(s): i was very tired after a rough night with otis, so i really appreciated getting to lie in the grass with my eyes closed as otis napped and while eamon played in the sand pit in city park. that night i went to bed at 8 pm. which was glorious.

friday was my last official day as a bt employee. it feels funny that my time there is done. i think i will habitually forget that i don't work there anymore. i feel peace about it though. it was time, and i'm grateful that i'm not returning.

saturday rose: i finished my gift for jill and ryan's wedding! and i hear that they bought a house, so it's good timing. it'll be a wedding AND house warming gift. we also got to go out to andrew's birthday party, which was really fun.

saturday thorn: otis cried a lot, and joelle had to call joy for reinforcement. i'm not upset or bothered that he cried so much, because he's a baby and will eventually grow out of this phase. but it would be nice to go out without worrying about him. eamon didn't struggle with babysitters the same way. otis particularly wants my company. i would love to get out more without him, or to go out with b more, but i guess i'll need to be patient til he gets there. next saturday and sunday, i'm doing a first aid course, and it will be the longest i've been away from him. i guess i'll have to wait and see how that goes.

Wednesday, August 09, 2017

rose: growing up, we always had an electric lawn mower. i'd heard once that if you try mowing when the grass is just a little bit damp, you would get electrocuted and die. that scared me, but i also used that to my advantage since it was a good excuse to not mow when i didn't want to. the cord was a real nuance, but i like that the handle bar would flip over to the other side. brendan wanted a gas mower when we were looking, so that's what we got. tonight, b was awaiting a call from our insurance company when he was only halfway through cutting the lawn, so i took over. despite the fact that i'd never used a gas mower before, i managed to turn it on, mow until the gas ran out, determine that it was out of gas, refill it with fuel, and continue mowing. i was quite proud of myself.

thorn: my first potential before and after school care client just fell through. her daughter goes to a different school, but i thought i might be able to manage meeting her at the bus. turns out the closest bus stop is too far from the school, and there isn't enough time to get there to pick her up. i'm pretty bummed out. also, i have concern that my other part-time job might not pan out. i'm someone who gets discouraged and encouraged very easily. things might turn around tomorrow. i've been told that parents are last minute and don't really start sorting out their plans until right before school. i'm just afraid that i'm not well connected in this neighbourhood, or that i don't have an established reputation, so parents won't want to give my service a try. thankfully, i crunched our numbers, and could manage until next summer on just one income. but hopefully that won't be necessary. i've spent so much time in the last week getting the basement set up. i've worked really hard. i hope things will pan out.