this morning an old man with a hat on merged into my lane and forced me off the road. i've heard before that statistically that old men with hats on are the most dangerous on the road. i dumbfounded by this interchange that i mostly just watched with my jaw dropped then managed to get my wits about me enough to honk at him. unfortunately it came out as a friendily "toot toot" and not as hey watch it "HONK". i kind of felt embarrassed for him. i know he didn't mean to.
after hearing about a very angry and uninformed anti-midwife rant, i got thinking... what IS an opinion? is an opinion a conclusion drawn to thru thorough investigation? is it a biased belief based on one-sided information? is it a world view, is it something taught to us? when people have really strong, passionate and angry opinions (about anything) i don't wish to change their minds, but if i could i would change how they came to those opinions so their views could be well informed. at the very least i wish people could be fair and honest about how they came to their opinions. i wish they'd say "i'm afraid of the unknown", "I feel threatened by strength and abilities, and that authority in my favour is being questioned", "that is inconvenient to my agenda and my world view". i remember once bren telling me that "why?" is a dangerous question. that people get their backs up and it causes defensiveness. she suggested "how?" as an alternative. hm. i get that, but i really want to ask people why. i guess i could say "why do you feel that way?" it creates some accountability and in some ways is even neutralizing. belief is always the root of opinion. i believe X so i'm stating or living Y. by asking why or how, i hope to uncover what's at the core. at least that way we may discover commonality or simply expose the simple bare bones rather than inflated emotion. yup, i think this is a stellar idea, just remembering to do it will be the tricky part.
after hearing about a very angry and uninformed anti-midwife rant, i got thinking... what IS an opinion? is an opinion a conclusion drawn to thru thorough investigation? is it a biased belief based on one-sided information? is it a world view, is it something taught to us? when people have really strong, passionate and angry opinions (about anything) i don't wish to change their minds, but if i could i would change how they came to those opinions so their views could be well informed. at the very least i wish people could be fair and honest about how they came to their opinions. i wish they'd say "i'm afraid of the unknown", "I feel threatened by strength and abilities, and that authority in my favour is being questioned", "that is inconvenient to my agenda and my world view". i remember once bren telling me that "why?" is a dangerous question. that people get their backs up and it causes defensiveness. she suggested "how?" as an alternative. hm. i get that, but i really want to ask people why. i guess i could say "why do you feel that way?" it creates some accountability and in some ways is even neutralizing. belief is always the root of opinion. i believe X so i'm stating or living Y. by asking why or how, i hope to uncover what's at the core. at least that way we may discover commonality or simply expose the simple bare bones rather than inflated emotion. yup, i think this is a stellar idea, just remembering to do it will be the tricky part.
gonna blow right through you like a breeze.
2 comments:
how about, "how did you come to have such a strong opinion about that?"
hahahah. i like that you started your suggestion with how.
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