i've been pretty down in the dumps for the last 24 hours, maybe even 36 hours. i'm pretty sure it's pms related and it will pass, but it's hard in the meantime.
as i reflected more on my last post, i worried that it may have further alienated me from those around me. i am feeling super toxic at the moment and i hope i did not offend while i reflected on the differences between me and others. when i'm feeling low, undervalued and isolated, i tend to push people away. b was in a very confusing place last night, torn between trying to affirm and love me, and trying not to step on the TNT that is me right now.
i keep trying to do the things i expect will help me feel better - a walk, a shower, some writing, some praying, some sleep, some food - but nothing's really helps. i think i'm just going to have to ride it out. i suspect that my attempt to self-soothe is making me naval-gazing and it'd probably do me some good to think of others instead of me right now.
i've just had a flash of inspiration. while i can't change my circumstances, i can choose how i respond. i'm going to TRY to be positive and hopeful. maybe i feel displaced right now, like i don't know where i belong, but it won't be like this forever. this could be a good opportunity for me to find a new place.
as i reflected more on my last post, i worried that it may have further alienated me from those around me. i am feeling super toxic at the moment and i hope i did not offend while i reflected on the differences between me and others. when i'm feeling low, undervalued and isolated, i tend to push people away. b was in a very confusing place last night, torn between trying to affirm and love me, and trying not to step on the TNT that is me right now.
i keep trying to do the things i expect will help me feel better - a walk, a shower, some writing, some praying, some sleep, some food - but nothing's really helps. i think i'm just going to have to ride it out. i suspect that my attempt to self-soothe is making me naval-gazing and it'd probably do me some good to think of others instead of me right now.
i've just had a flash of inspiration. while i can't change my circumstances, i can choose how i respond. i'm going to TRY to be positive and hopeful. maybe i feel displaced right now, like i don't know where i belong, but it won't be like this forever. this could be a good opportunity for me to find a new place.
he can sit along as my hair grows.
No comments:
Post a Comment