Friday, March 06, 2015

left and leaving

i super, SUPER hate leaving my crying baby in the morning to go to work.
i hate that i can't stay with him.
i hate that i have to turn and walk away.
i hate that it looks (to him) like i'm choosing something else.
i hate that it's sending the opposite message to what i want to send (one of comfort, care and presence).
i hate that i'm leaving someone i love to go to something that i'm pretty indifferent to.

i remind myself that it won't always be like this. that a time will come when i can stay with him.
but it sucks right now.

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