sometimes i'm amazed that i've known myself all my life and am still learning new things about me. i am not an organizer. meaning, i never think to organize events. and this bothers me, i'm disappointed, because i really like doing stuff and going places, and yet i'd have to lite a fire under myself if i was actually going to do it. i really like people who can come up with great fun ideas and execute them. i want more people like that in my life. don't get me wrong, i do have friends who are like that, but often our schedules conflict or they're busy doing their fun things with other people. i'm more of a go-along-with-other-peoples cool plans kind of person. i wonder if can change that about myself. i bet i could. once again i'm kind of lamenting the fact that i have very few friends in the same stage of life as me who can just drop everything to have grand adventures or even go with me to the goat on a sunday afternoon. but maybe it's not a matter of stage of life, maybe i just assume too often that no one is free.
i kind of wish i was more evasive. jason got me thinking today, he told me he thought i want everyone to know my business. hm. i wonder if that's true. it is in one sense, that i answer people honestly and i'm not very good at holding in my own business. but on the other hand, i want to be more secretive; to keep myself to myself. i haven't learned to be discreet, i'm legible, i'm translucent. you know? i guess that's just the facts. that's the way i am, so i guess instead of trying to change that, instead of "fixing" it, i'll just have to learn to pick my words more wisely instead of rambling and letting words come out of my mouth.
my ipod makes me strut.
sometimes in life you have to hope for the best.
3 comments:
Just a thought:
Hey I know we don't know each other very well and I read your blogs once in a while but never comment but just thought I would pass along a thought for you.
As you said you tell people your business. I used to be that person too until I got married now Joel is the only one that knows ALL of my business and not everyone else. Maybe like me you just need that one person to tell everything too. And even over time I keep more and more stuff to myself sometimes even from Joel but I think that is a God thing because the bible mentions so much about the mouth and keeping a tight reign on it.
Any way I guess I am saying you may not always be like that but enjoy it while you have it. It isn't always a bad thing telling every one what is going on. At least they know where you are at.
Dess
that's not untrue. whenever i have a guy in my life i definitely write less. i feel less inclined, but i also have less time to write.
i hear you two are going to be here for something like a month in the summer. that'll be much nicer than being here in march. i look forward to seeing you both :)
fyi: you are very good at holding onto your business when you want to be.
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