hugger

2011. 2011. without any great forethought, i'd have to say it wasn't the year i expected. i don't know what i expected, it just felt fuller. it was a great year with many significant highlights, but still something of a curve ball. surprisingly, the two greatest curve balls are also the two things that book-end 2011. almost right after new year, it may have been january 2, we started talking about the idea of brendan going back to school. at this point it seems so crazy to think there was a time when he wasn't pursuing social services, but indeed there was a period of consideration and discussion. as part of that decision he also took a job at startek and began working full time so he could save for his tuition. this was a major shift for us, but one that we adjusted to fairly well. the other book-end curve ball (wow, i'm mixing metaphors), was obviously our house. we've lived here for 2 weeks and are enjoying it a great deal. it's an adjustment, but i feel so positive about this move. i have no doubts that it was a good decision and a wise step.

january did not gently ease my next church community into the new year, but instead took the baby of some important friends during the 6th month of pregnancy. it felt like everyone i knew at that time was impacted by that experience. it weighed heavily on all of us, but was a great opportunity to pull together with great love. as always, the beat goes on and brendan started his new job and i started finally making progress with losing weight. i was working out with regularity and keeping close tabs on my food consumption. i'd made a new year's resolution to start cutting my portions in half, because i'd discovered that my instincts with food were disproportionate with how much i needed. oh, and we bought brendan's little netbook. it was supposed to be ours, but it's turned out to be mostly his. that's ok, he's pretty good at sharing.

february marked the end of my time on the board at next. with 3 years under my belt i was tired and really ready for a change. at work i continued to take on more responsibility and have enjoyed the challenge. it makes the day go faster when i'm busy all day. i started as editor of the internal newsletter, which turned out to be right up my alley. it was fun and engaging, and i was very surprised at how satisfying i found it. over the family day weekend brendan and i went to visit beckie in quebec city. it was cold, but very fun. 6-hour road-trips are surprisingly enjoyable when you're with your best bud. that was our second long trip together (having gone to north bay in 2010), and we've found it's quite doable. it was brendan's first time meeting beckie's dogs and they really won him over quickly :)

march brought the good word that brendan had official been accepted to college. meanwhile, i underwent a number of medical tests, which were part of a long on-going search to identify the cause of some semi-chronic pain i'd been experiencing. it was a stressful time for me, and unfortunately paired with the mysterious pain, but thankfully i tried to keep everything in perspective and in the end was cleared of anything serious and given some helpful tips. the main highlight of march was our trip to ireland. we spent 10 days in both the republic and the north, backpacking around and visiting with rachel and eric in dublin. we enjoyed the sites, the relaxed pace of holidays, pints of guinness and cadbury's chocolate. while we were there brendan lost his wedding ring (left it in a hostel shower), but thankfully he got it back after we went back to derry to retrieve it.

april was rather uneventful, although a tense time, with the election on the way. lots of opinions floating around on facebook and i recall a sense of division that i've never encountered before. i'm filled with alarm at the thought of this being the new status quo – division, silos, opinions. it's disheartening. but in more exciting news... although we learned this before april, we were thrilled with the news of a new niece on the way. ben and meg were expecting their first baby and we couldn't have been happier for them.

may brought an opportunity for me to begin a writing correspondence course. i love writing, and it comes naturally to me, but this was the first time since high school that i got to write with the purpose of improving and learning. i really enjoyed it and was delighted that i excelled in the course. without knowing it, i planted my last balcony garden at the maxipad. the plants all died halfway thru the season as usual, but i did enjoy that balcony. i may have especially enjoyed it this year. also in may, shanno and i got to attend a social justice conference at the sally ann.

june was a good excuse to purge myself of a lot of excess stuff via spring cleaning. with brendan and my work schedule's not lining up, i had a lot of time on weekends to get organized. as b was starting to look ahead to starting school in the fall, his work announced that it was closing all all the employees at his site would be layed off come september. the timing of that could not have worked out better for him since he was planning on leaving then anyways, and if they'd closed a few months sooner he wouldn't have had enough time to save up for both years of college tuition. phew! to celebrate our first wedding anniversary we took off to a B&B in westport and had a great mini-break there. when we returned to k-town we had our collective family over for ice cream cake. very fun :D

july was filled with strawberry picking, road trips with friends, summer weddings, new bicycle baskets, sandwiches, classic books, sweater knitting, summer walks, gelato, humidity, bonfires with smores, swimming at leo lafleur, the splashpad, heat exhaustion, spray painting, and i got 4 stitches in my second smallest toe after an incident involving a glass pitcher and a carton of sherbet. 

august allowed for a visit up to beckie's cottage. shanno, rach and i threw joanne a victorian-themed bridal shower, and i organized a group of knitters/crochetters to make jo blanket to take with her when she moved. mid-august brendan quit his job as planned, and we took off camping at bon echo for a week. it was our first time camping for that long and we had a great time. we found it was the perfect introverted paradise since no one else was around. we played board games, read books, ate great food and enjoyed marshmellow roasting every night. we lived thru one massive thunderstorm and realized afterwards that it was probably quite unsafe :p at the end of our trip, our wee niece audrey was born to ben and meg, so we packed up and went straight to the hospital to meet her. to conclude the summer months, b got his wisdom teeth extracted. it was a rather sour experience for him, but (in it's own way) a rite of passage. oh! and i mustn't forget that this year, for the first time, shanno, brendan and i were vendors at the wolfe island music festival selling la tienda merchandise.

september introduced a lot of change for us lorimers, as brendan entered school. he was one of two guys in a class with 30+ women. it became immediately clear that the only thing brendan needed to do to succeed at school was to be himself – since he's already passionate about social justice and serving marginalized people. by the end of the semester he had straight A's :D we spent a weekend camping with next at echo lake. the nights were cold but hanging out all together was a treat, and i missed the company other ladies when i returned home and had no one to chat with while i knitted.

october surprised us with an accepted offer on a house. the whole enterprise – from casually looking and a firm deal – took 2 to 3 weeks. we signed the paper work making it official on brendan's birthday. i'd planned a special birthday adventure for him, and buying a house was not something i'd originally scheduled for that day. two days later i took off for san diego on business and was there for about six days. that was fun. it was a great learning experience from a career perspective and i enjoyed the change of scenery from my cubicle.

november ushered in a new age – the age of crochet. i've tried in the past and failed, so i am very pleased that not only have i mastered a new skill, but i've also opened myself up to loads of new hand-crafting options :D as we prepared to move i created some fabric art for the walls. they turned out really great, and i had a really fun time doing it. shanno and i took our annual trip to the casino where we each spent 5 bux and drank free caffeinated beverages (well i did, i think shanno drank coffee cream).

december was like a changing of the guards – only the guards didn't changed but instead the guard house. we left the home i'd enjoyed for over 5 years and moved into a home that belongs to us. our own make-believe bungalow that suits us perfectly. moving day went remarkably well and happened to coincide with my birthday (seems suitable since we purchased it on brendan's birthday). it was quite convenient since i got to see my family and friends all at the same time anyways. that month, brendan also got his full G driver's license which yet another milestone ;)

anyways, that's it. it was a good year – a full and significant. a red letter year for sure. it feels like we're on a roll!

this is a happy end
come and give me your hand
i'll take you far away.

dwell

we just got home from a wedding reception in westport. i've been feeling extremely full of food for the last 2+ hours. it was fun though. about 3/4 of the way thru i started to feel tired and droopy, but then picked up a little bit again. the drive home was decent considering the freezing rain.

a couple weeks ago i had this sweeping notion that i needed to get a good quality coat for winter, specifically a feather down coat. the problem is that i'm quite a thrifty person and it's not within my ability to spend on one item the amount of money that a down jacket costs. but i went to trailhead to do some looking. i selected a brand (lolë) that i really liked and determined what size was best. then i came home and looked online and found one online for less than half the price, so i bought it with my birthday/christmas money :D it arrived in the mail today. i'm super pleased. it's so warm and not bulky. i'm super pleased. hooray!

it's hard to believe it's nearly 2012. i like setting new year resolutions, but i haven't had much time to think on it for the coming year. i hope i come up with something. i guess that my hope for 2012 is that i learn to make good use of space in our new home. but that's less of a new year resolution but rather a new house. i dunno, i find it helpful having a direction, even a small direction, to move in.

it feels weird being without a knitting or crocheting project. shanno gave me the happy hooker book for my birthday. i hope to get started on one of those patterns soon. plus, rach gave me a beautiful crochet hook. i didn't even know such a thing existed!

anyways, it's off to bed for me!

behind every tree
is a cutting machine
and a kite fallen from grace.

jigsaw

i have fully been enjoying my christmas holidays.

the last two days have been filled with painting, nintendo playing and a trip to the movies.

i've finished the bathroom and have applied 3 coats to the kitchen. the kitchen is a burnt red (actually it was supposed to be, it's turning out to be a robin red, but b likes it, he said this is how he imagined it) so it takes a lot of coats and there's plenty of paint left, so i suspect i'll probably do another 2 for a total of 5. i'm enjoying it. it's funny how the days feel much more restful than a work day even though i'm not actually resting.

we had a lovely christmas. went to nancy and gerry's place on christmas eve, ate treats, played 'sorry', watched a movie, and slept over. then we headed over to joy's place around 11 to open gifts (the kids did incredibly well waiting til then), and we opened presents for the next 2 hours. very fun. the kids were particularly in good spirits and we enjoyed them a lot.

i can't find out camera. i can't even remember where it was in the maxipad, which makes it even harder to find in the exile. i thought i'd kept it handy, but it turns out that was the flip camcorder. remember how i was making nana a blanket? well here it is!! i'm very pleased with how it turned out :D and she really liked it too!!


i need my 1987 DG-20 casio electric guitar.

fang

the office closed down at 1 today for the holidays, so i got to come home early. which meant i had enough time and energy to get a low done around the homestead. and i must say.... i'm so very pleased! now that we've got our bedroom set up properly and the living room is taking shape i keep thinking WE LIVE IN A REALLY AWESOME HOUSE!!! way cool :)

i can't find the camera so i can't take any pics to show you. but hopefully soon.

tonight b cooked dinner and we ate at the kitchen table for the first time. believe it or not, the small table we had in the maxipad's kitchen is too big (too long to be exact) so we have this little square table now, and it made me feel like we were eating in a bistro. i liked it a lot.

i'm so happy that i've begun my christmas holidays. it's one of my favourite times of the year – having the time at work. life feels easy in a special way. i hope this year is a good mix of relaxing and productive :)

i should go! we're about to watch the muppet's christmas carol!

and my friends,
i've returned to wish you all the best...
and my friends,
i've returned to wish you a happy christmas.

megaphone

i feel like we're mildly stalking our upstairs tenants. the suspicious side of me thinks they're purposely avoiding us. but the part of me that wants to give people the benefit of the doubt just thinks that we keep missing them or if they are avoiding us it's because they're needlessly concerned/feeling threatened. whatever the situation, i'd really like to get introductions over with. if they choose to avoid us after that then that's fine, but at least we'll be acquainted and have a record of their names. i suppose the only things that matter are that they pay their rent on time and they don't burn our house down.

we accidentally forgot our crockpot at the maxipad. i remembered seeing it in the lower cupboard and thinking we need to remember to pack it. but then we didn't, so b had to get the key from our landlord's mom and go back in one last time. she thanked us for leaving it in such good shape, which was nice to hear. i'd actually felt that i'd left it in worse shape than when i moved in, but i think that's more because of age and wear & tear than anything else.

my dad needs to have semi-emergency bypass surgery next week. it's a semi-emergency because they only just realized that his main artery is clogged and needs to be cleared out asap. it's only been a week and a half since he first noticed some chest discomfort when walking with purpose. things have gone very quickly. i'm trying not to worry. i know that it's a good sign that they discovered it before anything happened, and he's been given a nitro patch to thin his blood. it just feels like he has a ticking time bomb in his chest and i'll feel at ease when it's disarmed.

to my disappointment, my appetite hasn't fully returned since i was sick earlier this week. in one way it's nice that i'm never hungry (i become quite irrational when i'm hungry), but mostly it sucks because b took me out for my birthday dinner to chien noir and i hardly ate anything. it's must less fun when you can't enjoy your food and you have to watch someone else eat your creme brule (even though you willing gave it to them because you simply weren't hungry).

it's weird living on the first floor of a house again. i haven't lived so low to the ground in a long time. usually i don't mind people seeing in my windows, but as rach pointed out, i'm not accustomed to being so accessible. that's making me a little uncomfortable. i don't like that my computer is exposed. b keeps telling me that no one wants to steal my eight year old computer, but sometimes i think people just want stuff for no other reason but because it's within their grasp. i'm going to buy a less transparent blind.

 

the evening approaches

it is the time of the winter solstice.

deuteragonist

sometimes.... i'm lucky enough to end up sitting in THE most comfortable position that i don't want to get up for anything. now is one of those times.

while unpacking in the den, we were quite amused with our "entertainment centre". it consists of pine boards, an old tv, a vcr and an original nintendo system. we do have a dvd player, and the only reason we have the vcr is because it launders the signal from our dvd player (it and the tv are not compatible). i like how lo-fi we are. it suits us just fine :) i think we're slowly finding our bearings at the exile, and the kitties are adjusting. although, honey still seems to be out of sorts - walking around in the basement meowing loudly for no apparent reason. maybe she left her heart back at the maxipad along with our crockpot.

my mom bought me my nintendo when i was either 12 or 13 for my birthday back in the early 90s. i remember us standing in toys r us for a very long time while she hum-ed and ha-ed over whether or not to buy a nintendo or a game-boy. which was the better choice - the game boy was cheaper, but i would get more use out of a nintendo. i think we made the right choice. in 2002, when i moved back from toronto i lost my controllers in transition and have been meaning to replace them ever since. when brendan first came across my unused nintendo he wanted us to take it to chumleighs because we'd make a killing on it, but i was NOT willing to even consider that. the problem is that brendan has difficultly with moderation, and in the past he developed a video game addiction, so since then he's been avoiding having video games in his house. now that i've replaced my controlers (bought brand new ones at chumleighs for 5 bux each), between the two of us we'll need to develop healthy boundaries around nintendo playing. so far it's been nothing but fun :) we've been playing super mario bros 3 and have found it's a great marriage game since we have to work as a team. i'm hoping that over christmas we can have one day of just playing all day and can beat the whole game together (something i've only done 2 or 3 times in my life - world 8 is HARD). apparently i'm stressful to watch while i play. i use my whole body and get quite worked up. i think it's that he's never seen a girl play nintendo before :p

my stomach seems to be feeling better and think i'll be well enough for my birthday dinner out at chien noir tonight. i'm excited because we're getting the winterlicious deal with includes an appetizer, a main course and dessert for $27. it's a bargin AND it's tasty. yay! the very fact that i'm thinking food sounds yummy is a good sign that i'm recovering from my stomach bug.

 

she is supergirl superwoman super-sexy-woman.

cordless drill

well we're here! we're in! it's been a crazy last few days, mostly because i contracted liam's weird stomach bug and was sick sunday evening, barfing in the night, and have felt awful all day. not at all what i thought my sunday and monday would be like. hence the reason why i'm only checking in now.

the move went superbly on saturday. everyone worked really hard and got along really well. i think it took about three hours to move everything over then we had pizza, i opened gifts, then we had cake. there were still a lot of errands to run that evening so we didn't get as much done that night as i'd hope.

our first night's sleep here was ok, except at about 2:30 in the morning the upstairs neighbours (our tenants who we still haven't met yet), were walking around and the floors were creaking and making me bonkers. then b woke up at 4 because he remembered that he didn't put the cake away (which i already had) and in doing so woke me up and i couldn't fall back to sleep. i haven't been sleeping well lately, in the sense that i can't sleep in. too much on my mind. however, the good thing about throwing up in the night last night was that i was too ill and too exhausted to get up, so i slept in til 11.

yesterday joelle and caleb were in a christmas pagent at their church so we went to see it. it was pretty entertaining. caleb was in a world of his own and looked so cute because he was the youngest and looked so little. joelle did great. she was a real nature and i thought she was a better reader than some of the older kids – she had inflection in her voice.

i feel good. it chose not to give a lot of thought to leaving the maxipad. i'd already said good-bye so i didn't want to do that all over again. i know the exile will be filled with wonderful experiences too and i'm excited about that. i don't feel relaxed, and therefore don't quite feel at home yet, but i'm certain that has more to do with the boxes and chaos than anything else. the bathroom is the most complete, and it delights me each time i go in there.

we've had a lot of local visitors and waves, which have been very fun already. i like picardsville (the original name for this area. our street was the main st of picardsville). it feels good to be here, definitely feels like home.

home is wherever i'm with you.

cocoon

i found an ad in the newspaper for a 1 bedroom apartment with back porch and front balcony looking over an open green space. from the first moment i got wind of that apartment it seemed like a good fit. shortly after i came to see the maxipad for the first time and signed up on the same day.

with the help of 15ish people i moved in at the end of april 2006, and proceeded to spend the next 5 and a half years here. when i first arrived i didn't know how long i'd be here, or what experiences i'd have within these walls, or under what circumstances i'd leave. i made a home in this quirky apartment; painting it's wood paneled walls, lying on it's orange shag carpet, showering in it's low-ceiling bathroom. to have people visit me in this space, especially in the early days, felt much the same as letting them into my very self. without knowing it, the maxipad became part of my self identity.

it's funny the way we can find ourselves at a loss for words when it comes to that which we love the most. that's how i feel right now as i try to form a stream of words about my beloved balcony. i don't even know what to say, nothing seems adequate enough.

***
dear maxipad...
  my home of half a decade.
  my coming of age home.
  my safe place of refuge.

you've been good to me. you've sheltered me and given me security when i needed it most. you were also a place for us to fall in love and bind ourselves together.

you gave me my favourite place in the whole world – my balcony. where i planted gardens and watched things grow. where i sat in the shelter of the awning to hear the sound of summer rain and yet stay dry. i watched people go by in the daylight. sat in the dark of night and eavesdropped in conversations echo from up the street. i lied on the wooden floor in the heatwaves and read books with great satisfaction in the company of my kitties. nowhere else in the world have i felt both safe and free at the same time. sometimes it feels like you embody what it means to be truly content. you've made a mark on me. just as in all love affairs, i've been changed by you, and i bear the invisible and ever-present traces of that experience.

i leave you now not without hesitation – for everyone is always hesitant to leave a place of fond memories – but similarly to a person who leaves summer camp or a trip abroad, i know i'm going home. the fondness i have for you will not disappear. in fact i'm prone to believing that there will be none who loves you as i do. although, i'm not afraid to love another. it's only natural and as it should be. i'm confident that it would not be disloyal or even unfaithful, especially since both of us are moving on. you will soon welcome someone new into this space.

i'll miss you too bedroom birds. you are like a tattoo on my non-biological body. you get be painted over, although, on the other hand they may want to keep you. you are after all, very low-maintenance birds.

so, i think that's it. i love you maxipad. thanks for all you've been to me.

***
we don't live here anymore.

hurricane

i've been thinking about the word and concept of 'home' since rach's comment about feeling at home as soon as she arrived at her house on moving day. what makes a place feel like home? what makes one place feel differently than another. i mentioned to be that the exile won't feel like home at first, and he said it will still be good. it made me think about the times we've been on trips and stayed at different places and how it's fun and kind of exciting. even if it doesn't feel like home at first it will still be fun. that said though, i think it will. it's a brendan+lesley sized home. b says 'no one else could live there but us'. it will be little and it will be ours, and it will be wonderful :)

my heart is returned to sister winter.

rebate

after last weeks fiasco with my long pants, i thought i should take advantage of my christmas shopping trip to the mall and drop of my pants at stitch-it for some hemming. since it's been several years since i had pants hemmed (due to my hatred for errands) i ended up taking 4 pairs of pants. clearly there was a backlog. they were supposed to be ready yesterday by 5, but when i went to get them they were next in line to be worked on, so i said i'd come back tonight. i'm very excited to have pants the right length. they'll be so much more comfortable!

i'm starting to feel weird about moving. it's not cold feet exactly, because i don't want to stay but now that moving day is so soon it's pretty overwhelming! like, we're going to be living in a new place, with new neighbours and new tenants (who have not acknowledged the polite note we left for them by sending us their email addresses). it's funny because i thought i've experienced all the possible waves of anxiety so i'm surprised by this - the moving in and getting settled part - since it's been the thing i've been looking forward to the most! i'm sure that when we arrive i won't look back. just like birthdays. i always feel weird about turning the new age, but when my birthday arrives it's totally great.

it's hard to believe that i'm turning 32 on saturday, i haven't given any thought to that at all. too much going on. i'm ok with that though, i think 32 is a good solid number. its a very whole sounding number. unlike 31 which seems a little off balance. a little bit not quite right. hey! it just occured to me that i will be 32 while b is 23 :) LIKE!

while i was sick in november i watched a movie called the extra man. ever since i've haven't been able to think of a christmas ball the same. i'm certain that from now on i'll always associate them with that movie and the strange thing is... i don't think anyone else has seen the film, nor would i suggest it (just a little dull, although kevin kline is great in it). it's both forget able and unforgettable at the same time. although, it inspired me to ask for a cloche hat for christmas.

did you google what a cloche hat is?

i bet you did.

didn't you... ;)


my friends
i've begun to worry
right where I should be grateful...
i should be satisfied.

bare

nothing motivates me to get to work on time then the need for a nearby parking spot. in the last 6 to 8 months there has been an influx of staff at my office which means the parking lot is full by the time i arrive (usually a few minutes late). which means i have to park in a farther away parking lot, coincidentally making me even more minutes late. after 8+ years, nothing – not fear of boss, not fear of judgmental colleagues, not fear of self-disappointment – could give me the necessary desire to arrive on-time until now.

about a year ago i ordered some awesome socks online planning to make a habit of it, but forgot after that. they were great socks but i haven't seen them since returning from ireland and i've wondered if i lost them there. but no, i found them while packing!! i was looking forward to finding the things that i've lost during the packing process, so i was really quite pleased.

we did all our christmas shopping today. i've concluded doing them in one shot is the best way for us at handling the stores and crowds. before going i packed snacks and made myself a sandwich. i also remembered that we needed to bring along bags with us. it was a long affair but we got everything finished and are quite pleased. we ended our shopping at the goat for a lovely cup of hot chocolate. not bad. not bad at all :)

cause i don't care too much for money,
for money can't buy me love.

galaxy

this might go without saying, but i won't be throwing myself a birthday party this year. i really enjoy my yearly birthday gatherings, and i look forward to next year's get together. but this year, with us moving on my birthday, things are going to be kind of hectic. instead we'll just have EVERYONE over in january for an open house to warm the place. that will be fun. stay tuned!

 

you get mistaken for strangers by your own friends.

bowling lanes

so i fed my cat an egg. or at least tried to. why? whenever i made an egg salad sandwich she goes all crazy like she wants to eat it. so i looked up if cats can eat hard boiled eggs, and they can. since she's on a hunger strike right now i thought it could be a way of coaxing her into eating. it didn't work. even though she meowed and meowed and meowed at me while i mashed it up, she promptly turned her nose up at it. when i let pekoe out of the bathroom (where i lock him so he won't eat honey's food) he didn't want to eat it either. this said, these are the same cats who were skeptical of tuna juice at first. i literary had to dip their noses into it to make them try it. 

i spend my time just making rhymes.

metres

i don't actually remember the last time i was looking forward to my birthday so much. i must have been a teenager. i used to count down to my birthday like i expected some grand event, and was always kind of let down because it never quite lived up to my expectations. however, this year is different. on my 32nd birthday we'll move into our new house :) i'm really very excited. we didn't plan it so that it would happen on my birthday, that's just how it worked out, but i'm actually really happy it did :)

at the xmas party on saturday, i was struck by how different i felt from last year. at the previous party i was at the height of feeling tormented over my weight. i'd had a gym membership for 2 months and had only gained weight. its funny how in the end it wasn't the gym that helped me shed the weight but simply controling my in take. i'm really pleased with what i accomplished, and i feel good in my body again. my clothes fit properly and i'm comfortable.

it's amazing how much garbage is created when packing. last week i woke up early, and at 6:30 collected up the trash to take the the curb. but before i had the chance to take it out i saw the garbage truck outside our house. i was minutes too late. as a result we have an excessive amount of trash this week.

we packed all out kitchenware on the weekend, so we eat off picnic dishware and each have one cup. brendan really likes it. to be fair, i'd probably feel the same way if i were him, since he washes all the dishes. it's fun using makeshift dishes. tupperware as bowls.

 

i love crossing things off lists. that's probably my favourite thing about packing :D

 

your sister's bangs...
she cut them herself.

moonshine

my finger is oddly swollen.

in doing some pre-house planning i've been on the look out for a loveseat for our den. for sitting on while watching movies. i've been looking around for quite some time, and found one on kijiji last week that would do the trick. so this evening i swung by and picked it up, fitting it perfectly into the back of our small suv.

all day long my pants have been too long. i had them folded up but either the heel or the toe would get caught in the fold and i would trip. so far i have not fallen, but i fear that i might if i don't do something about it. so i kept them unfolded touching the ground. they soon got wet on a count of the rain.

my long pants,
my high heeled boots,
feeling thirsty,
and hungry,
in the rain,
all made for the wrong state of mind to unload the new loveseat into our chaotic apartment. but we tried anyways. we pushed and pulled and twisted and turned that loveseat. finally in a fit of frustration i changed my pants and boots, then positions so that i was in the front of the couch. unfortunately, b, who was losing his patience for reasonable reasons, rammed the couch really hard, trapping my pinky finger. it was damaged in the most peculiar way. it immediately swelled up, and the skin was torn but not bleeding. and man, did it hurt. strangely enough, in that moment of finger agony i made the immediate decision (one that had not crossed our minds at all until then) that we would put the loveseat back into the car and take it to next to be stored there until moving day.

it's been a few hours and the pain has subsided. it's still oddly swollen and bent slightly. but i can use it, which is good.

december is an strange month to be moving in. nothing feels normal at all.

two can be as bad as one,
It's the loneliest number since the number one.

spoof

sometimes in the winter i get eczema on my eyelid. it's starting already. i tried putting this intense cream on it and not it's burning. i think i need to get some proper eczema lotion.

well i got everything sorted out with the home insurance stuff. phew! that stressed me out more than it should've. i think it was because i wasn't expecting it to be so difficult. thankfully our realtor provided us with the missing information. i'm pleased that our home insurance is a good rate, only a little more than our current renter's insurance. i've concluded that unwittingly, renter's insurance was one of the best decisions i've ever made. it was an excellent transition aid into home ownership. we spent a great deal of time this weekend packing. we've gotten most of the kitchen packed up and plan to eat off our picnic set for the next 9 days. i've been cleaning as we go, so most of the cupboards have already been cleaned out, which makes me feel like we're making great progress. i'm hoping that by this weekend we'll have the majority finished and we can just saturday to do our christmas shopping.

while packing i listened to 'this is that' on cbc. to be honest, i don't really get that show. why make up fake news? i tuned in half way thru the show and i thought the first story was real!

we took a break from packing on saturday evening to go to the bbd annual christmas party. we got all dressed up, me in a black and purple dress, and b in his vest purple tie combo :) i was a little nervous because frank and marilyn were not going to be there and i wasn't sure who we'd sit with. but it turns out that a girl that brendan was acquainted with was there with her boyfriend who's an intern at bbd and she invited us to sit with them. it was just the four of us at a table of 8 but it was still fun. near the end of the evening we started guessing what song the dj would play first, and brendan guessed right with "tonight's gonna be a good night" by the black eyed peas :p all in all it was a fun time. and since brendan just got his driver's licence he could legally drive home after having wine with his dinner.

my dad joined facebook yesterday. hilarious. so far his only friend are me, b and joy+tim (who have a joint account). i wonder if he and my mom will be facebook friends.

 

simply...

having...

a wonderful christmas time.

yikes

i feel so stressed out today that i almost feel in pain. i'm so frustrated over this house insurance stuff. i don't have the answers they need to start our home insurance, and i can't find the papers from our home inspection. i'm kicking myself for not being more organized. i really try my best, i try very hard to keep on top of things and keep important papers in important places - which is why i kept all our papers in the same place, but know i can't find the file folder. and even if i find it, i don't know if it will have the information i'm looking for. for some reason all this stress and anxiety is culiminating in feeling simply mad about it. it's making me feel tired and overwhelmed.

in brighter news, brendan passed his driving test yesterday so he now has his full G licence and will never need to undergo that process again. it feels like a big accomplishment to have one's G licence. i was very thrilled. one of the exciting things about being married to a younger man is that i get to enjoy seeing him reach these milestones. there's really nothing like seeing someone you're a big fan of knock one success out of the park, then another, and another. it's funny how even though i was confident he'd pass, there's always the looming thought "what if he doesn't?". similar to other things, eg we need to get an emissions test done on the car. and although i'm fairly certain it will pass, i still have to consider "what if it doesn't?"

what if?
what if?
what if?

what if i can't find out what kind of wiring we have in the house? or the percentage of galvinized piping? or the amp service?

i seriously need some kind of stress reliever to take the edge off.

tie up your boots,
jump off the ladder,
pack up your clothes,
nothing's the matter.