this evening i attended the banff mountain film festival with rhonda and co. it was great as usual. my favourite films were: the one about the two montrealers who biked thru mongolia, into china, passed thru nepal, went on into india and ended in calcutta; the one about the crazy potty-mouthed christian crack climber from switzerland; and the one about no-boarding. all in all it was super cool.
it got me thinking about a many things. today i paid off my first of three student loans thanks to the money my grandma left me. this has sparked a 3 year plan that concludes with me making my final payment (prematurely) on my 30th birthday. what's the connection to the film festival? well... it means the year 2010 will be completely open for me. i'll have no debt (all going well), so the film festival got me wondering... "what will i do next?" i don't know. but i have 3 years to figure that out AND 2 more annual film festivals to attend and be inspired by. i'm uber excited.
i dunno. i've kind of come to the conclusion that its not possible to miss your destiny. it always comes back around. if it was really meant to happen you'll get a second chance. as you know, i've lamented not being able to have big adventures because i only get 3 weeks vacation and spend the rest of the year in my 8x8 blue cube. but everything unfolds in due time, and i really haven't "missed my big chance".
maybe i'm more a product of my environment than i think i am. probably. i haven't a clue what i actually want. i'm starting to worry that my shyness will hold me back more than i want it to. perhaps i'm more a creature of familiarity than i want to be. how DO you become the person you want to be, when you're so ingrained already. meh. whatever. i don't want to load my mind with such thoughts when feeling so optimistic.
the festival was interesting. it felt like it brought out all of kingston's late 20's-early 30's population. never before have i seen so many people my age all together, it was nice to know there are plenty of us in this city. they DON'T all leave when they graduate.
hey check me out... i'm eating havarti.
sometimes my mind plays tricks on me.
5 comments:
You have never struck me as shy, Les.
oh rach... i'm very shy. it's probably one of my biggest hurdles. it's true, i don't seem shy, but that's because i'm in familar & comfortable surroundings. to my disappointment, i felt quite shy in kenya, which reminded me that it's still in my system even if it doesn't often plague me.
Congratulations on paying off one of your student loans. Getting Out Of Debt is GOOD! (Note the acrostic. Cheesy, eh?)
I hope you had renegotiated those student loans and didn't just pay the rate they offered. Student loans are one of the biggest rip-offs going. (If you haven't negotiated, I might be able to give you some tips.)
yeah, you don't strike me as shy, either. but then i probably don't strike people that way, and i know i am sometimes.
but what i wanted to say is this: to be who you want to become, you gotta do stuff. you are what you do, to a certain extent. if you want to be ms adventure, you have to go seek out the adventures you want to do... if you want to be calm, you gotta meditate.
i don't know if that makes sense. i'm not being clear.
off topic, you know what i hate? when you have to type in those letters in the visual verification box, but the letter-image never loads! grr... tenth try's the charm..... grr... WTF?
thanks bob! i didn't realize there were ways to negotiate these things. we should talk.
oh beckie, sadly its true i am shy. the butlers can attest to it. i'm afraid that my shyness will hold me back from doing the things i want to do! argh, stupid shyness. well i will overcome.
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