fiat

i just got home from yet another bombardier christmas party. i had a nice time as usual. i ate a big meal and danced the night away. both the eating and the dancing really surprised me since i can't usually consume a lot of food and i don't usually dance in public. two years ago, i went with april and mayelin. then last year, neither of them worked at bbd so i went alone. then this year they were both there again. that amazes me. it was really fun and we had a lot of laughs. it's nice to get dressed up on occasion and feel like a woman.


i've come to an important conclusions – i'm not going to write entries when i'm pmsing. i don't think it's a good idea. i have a pretty short memory for when it comes to feelings, and i think it's better for me to forget feeling hopeless once it moves on instead of immortalizing it in writing.

i was really disappointed because i didn't have time to go to joanna's christmas party this afternoon. i just didn't have enough time to get everything done, and i get overwhelmed very easily. i don't really know how other people do it. i sometimes struggle to keep it all together.

hm

i want to thank myself for being so hard on myself.
there's no one else could know how much i really must improve.
i see my faults come through in every aspect of my life.
i just see the downside of every single thing i do.
i should point out that overall i'm not so negative
i know that there are mostly good things for me in this world.
i feel like, all in all, i'm only being realistic.
i'm glad to see the merits of the things i'm trying to do.