i think there's a real epidemic in the world today of lonely people. and the thing that really gets me is that no one wants to admit it. now don't get me wrong, this rant isn't coming out of my own feelings of loneliness, because right now i'm not lonely. but if i WAS lonely i'd tell you. and that's what i don't understand. there are hordes of lonely people out there, the problem is how do we connect them with other people to end their loneliness. i think instead of internet dating, there should be internet friends sites. places where lonely people can meet other people who are also feeling isolated. i think the problem is with our culture. i have a feeling there are less lonely people in africa, where everyone (or a lot of people) still live in tribes. i'm fortunate, next church is my tribe. but what do people do who don't go to church? where to they meet people and fit in. i don't know. it makes me sad. its this underlying problem in our society, i think we should be open and upfront about it. i bet there are more confessed alcholics out there then isolated people. it think that's because there are groups and organizations out there to support alcholics, letting them know that things will get better once they admit their problem. if someone told me "i'm lonely" i'd be more inclined to invite them along to things, otherwise i assume their busy or have enough going on in their lives. i don't know, i'm a wear "my life on my sleeve" kind of person, you can honestly accuse me of not being upfront about how i feel. so maybe that makes me unsympathic to others because i think "what's their problem? why don't they just say what's going on in their life?" i guess its a matter of patience. all i know is there's more to life than dating. and if people need to chronically date in order to be happy – that's a problem. try making friends instead of lovers, you'll find there's a greater return.
when i go swimming in your intellect the water's so shallow
4 comments:
Wow that's deep. But i think that your perspective is a little bit narrow on this one. It may be easy for you to vocalize your feelings and just say "I need a friend" and find one, but it's not that way with everyone. I'm mostly speaking from personal experience. It takes me a long time to feel comfortable and open up with someone. So making friends doesn't come easy.
When it comes to loneliness i think the underlying problem is more that you feel like there isn't anyone out there that cares. So you don't feel like there is anyone out there to validate your feelings of loneliness. It's a vicious cycle.
For me, i deal with depression as well. So i there are times when i feel like it'll never get better. It's not a simple thing.
Your post did stimulate some thought in me though. I'm still processing it but wanted to make a quicke comment.
Loneliness is not solved by dating though, i definitely agree with you on that one.
hmmm, i don't disagree with you at all. however, i don't think my perspective is too narrow because i didn't go into the whole other side of the story. the truth is, i struggled for years and years with loneliness, but that's something too close to my heart and i'm not willing to talk about on my blog.
my point was more about not just dating as a result of loneliness. that the world is set-up to direct people to "finding mr. right-now" instead of getting hobbies and having a life.
i'm tired of people pushing men at me just because i'm single. i'm not interested, that's ok with me. why isn't it ok with them??
sure i still get lonely from time to time and that's alright. there's nothing wrong with being lonely. its not a diease to be cured, its sometimes a symptom of something else.
maybe it sounds like i'm contradicting myself, but maybe i'm just not communicating myself very clearly. i dunno know.
thanks for your thoughts joel :)
There _are_ online communities that people can join to meet others and to discuss things and generally feel accepted. Look at the success of things like MySpace.com and friendster.com... they're places where you can meet people with similar interests and "hang out" (albeit virtually).
Technology to the rescue!
cool thanks bud!! i'm so internet ignorant at time. you're a pal.
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