dragons

well, i've been home with a headcold today. i'm definitely feeling better, so i think i'm on the mend. i'm glad, because i know i have time sensitive things to deal with at work.

since yesterday evening, when i started feeling under the weather, i've been super impatient with éamon. i don't have a lot to offer him, and he's been rather demanding, per his age.

i'm starting to think it might be time to rearrange our living arrangement, so that he has his own room. this is a major sacrifice for me since i use our den A LOT. it's largely my space, and i really value it. but i also know i'd value éamon sleeping through the night and not waking frequently to nurse. i'm of the belief that he'd nurse less at night if i wasn't in the room, but it's really just a theory.

i tried to get some expert advise on weaning a toddler – because all the online advise on weaning is for mothers of young babies. i can't find anything about nursing a toddler, and i think weaning at this stage has it's own distinct set of challenges. but he just said that his objective is to help people nurse, not help them stop. and questioned why i even wanted to start weaning. which super annoyed me. i don't feel i should have to make a case for myself to get some good advise.

that said, i mostly want to stop because it's starting to become a negative experience. he screams and yells at me, he grabs at my body and freaks out when i say no, he won't soothe himself back to sleep at night (even though he can), his tantrums at night disrupt ALL of our sleep. i really feel we'd all be better off if we started to wrap it up.