galoshes

i'm sleepy but i want to stay up reading. my spirit is willing, but my flesh is weak....

shannon and i went go-karting this afternoon! each summer i want to go but can never find anyone willing to go with me. we were the oldest people there who weren't accompanying children. it was pretty fun and was shan's first time ever. afterwards i got thinking about how the only difference between doing something and not is the act of going and doing it. it's pretty simple. you want to do something, so do it! i need to act on these things more often instead of letting 10 years of wanting to go-kart go by. i love doing stuff :)

later today i went to amadeus cafe with rhonda & isaac. i'd never been there before, but after meeting the owner at michelle's place i decided i should get on that. so just like with the go-karting we went, and it's now crossed off my list of things i've never done before that i've been wanting to do. it was good!

i'm sure i've mentioned this before, but write of it again to emphasize the extent of my problem. i have a major compulsion to paint my fingernails. inspite of this urge i'm also quite disgusted by it. i use crazy strong colours and find the whole ordeal quite ghastly. i worry sometimes that other people are grossed out by it because i sure am. it doesn't suit me at all, my nails are short and my fingers are small. i wish i could stop, but i've discovered it's a guilty pleasure so i continue. it's like self-inflicted cruelty.

i live in a breakable takeable body – an ever-increasingly valuable body.