I feel like life has become less romanticized as I've gotten older. or that I'm less romanticized about life than I once was. I think it's partly that I've mellowed out, and am less driven by emotions and feelings than I was in my teens and 20s. drama has really lost all its appeal.
but there's one exception... the song "when we go, how we go (part 1)" by rock plaza central. that song immediately immerses me back into the experience of falling in love with Brendan. it even feels funny saying "falling in love", because I don't normally talk that way, but that's really the only way to describe that experience and that song.
we've been married 6 years, and things have changed since those early days. changed between us and around us. I feel like our connection is deeper and more mature. we've changed as people, and evolved in positive ways. I think we continue to bring out the good in each other. I feel really fortunate. it took a long time to "find" my b, but I'm glad I kept waiting. I regularly have nightmares that I'm being forced to marry someone else, when it's really Brendan that I want to be with. I think the root of this dream is the reality that I could've ended up with many ill-suited suitors. I'm glad I held out and didn't take a shortcut.
I like to see him sleep. it's nice sleeping beside him, but there's something very intimate about seeing someone lying asleep in your bed as you get up and ready for work.
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