proof

exhale... i've just arrived home. i've been out all day. first, and most obviously, i was at work. second i was at my mom's for dinner. third i was at the hatch folding party. there was a great turn out tonight and we managed to fold, stuff and staple 500 copies. if you'd like one, please send me your request (and address if necessary). it's a gooder. next step is i have to take them to work and cut them all on the guillotine. THEN we're done. good stuff, good teamwork.

apparently the cat is out of the bag. it's rather embarrassing. does no one know how to play it cool!?!?! :p

i sat beside jay who talked my ear off the entire evening about his visits to a nudest resort. every time i thought the story was over and we'd all moved on to other topics, he'd gently direct my attention back to his nude escapades. it made me a little uncomfortable, there's only so many naked jay stories that i can handle. aside from my awkward shifting in my chair, i had a really good time, and laughed loudly outloud many times. you know the kind of laugh when you throw your head back and the cackle comes from deep in your throat. ah, it felt good.

my mom told me tonight that she and joy are taken a back by my confidence. i guess when i was talking to joy the other night i was telling her how great i am and she didn't know what to think. i laughed and said "oh come on mom! i say that kind of stuff tongue-in-cheek!". sure, i've been known to talk about how awesome i am, that i'm charming & adorable, or sexy as hell. but i'm not serious! if i say that kind of thing and the person i'm talking to starts to laugh i know they "get" it. if they don't, they've clearly missed the point. i'm the first person to criticize me, i have no false delusions. but i think i have a pretty good balance between loving myself and finding me incredibly annoying and frustrating. besides, i take credit for nothing.

i'm just so sick of feeling less than perfect.