rotation

another saturday has come and gone. i will miss you great day of nothingness. you're wonderful – i crave you all week.

i went square dancing with andrew and shannon tonight. on the way there i told them that i wasn't really in a dancy mood, but was more interested in the social activity and people watching. it's usually on wolfe island, but for some reason it was at st. james parish instead. the group dynamics where different, there were more older people and only one kid (usually there's a ton of kids). i concluded that square dancing is very confusing and can result in frustration (for me). i think that's why i prefer just sitting out and watching. i laughed and stomped to the music and thoroughly enjoyed the view. i couldn't help but notice my eyes were drawn to a particularly beautiful man, when i realized i tried to stop, but there's just something about beautiful men that makes it hard to keep your eyes off them. it wasn't like i wanted to get to know him or anything, i just liked looking at him. i did a fair share of dancing, more than andrew expected me to. but i really did prefer to watch. afterward, the three of us went to the toucan for some drinks. it was fun, it feels like ages since i went to a pub.

i'm far to prone to getting engulfed in my emotions. how i'm feeling at any given moment tends to overwhelm me and cause temporary blindness. and the confusing thing is that my emotions seem to have a logic unto themselves. that's fine when all goes well, but more challenging when circumstances are less than desirable. i aspire to be more grounded.

i can't help but wonder.