i'm really tired. its been a busy day.
i did an employee survey today at work. they grouped us alphabetically. i ended up in the same group as argo (for those of you who don't remember, argo is the 50 something year old man who kept trying to get me to have an affair with him), i was amused by the fact that he said hi to everyone but me. the survey went well, and i was pleasantly surprised to discover how happy i am with my job. i just wish we were busier these days and i had more to challenge me. next week i'm going to toronto for a day to go to the CUTA (Canadian Urban Transit Association) exhibition. i'm pretty excited about that. so that's tuesday.
after work i hung out with david. we ate pomegranates and looked at my pictures from kenya. i wore black, he wore an apron. i feel like i talked his ear off the entire evening, stories of my life – from stitches to my parents split. whoa, that was a lopsided conversation, however i did hear recently that women talk twice as much as men. so i shouldn't feel too bad. besides, i don't THINK he was bored – i'm a pretty animated story teller.
we went to the brew pub to meet up with helen & terrence and bumped into al & gang. that was fun too, but then i had to jet to rhonda's for greys. melissa & laney... i missed having you there. linds, it was lovely having your company.
out with it. the truth can't be more awkward. am i'm holding back? i guess i am. even though i said i wouldn't. only because telling the truth will lead down paths i've already been. you don't want to go there again. or at least i don't want to. i can only be reminded so many times. you've got to show me i won't get the same response. sometimes i feel like i could wait forever, but only if i'm not waiting in vain.
dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free.
9 comments:
You're waiting in vain.
ouch. that one stung a little bit. but you're probably right. how do i find out for sure?? argh. what a mess.
Sorry. I tend to be insensitive on these things. (Understandably, in view of the fact that I'm talking about something I don't know the first thing about!) It just seems that if, in the midst of your hope, you're still doubtful, your sensible self might be trying to tell your emotional self that things just aren't going to work out. I tend to listen to the sensible self - if only to protect my emotional self. Maybe my emotional self just needs a lot more protection than your emotional self.
you have an excellent point on that. i really like that, i'm going to remember that. my "sensible self" and my "emotional self". yes, i think you're right, but i think for once it was my sensible self that got me into trouble.
my emotional self probably needs excessive protection. however, it dominates my life and my senisble self usually gets left out.
I don't think our sensible self and our emotional self need always be at odds! Isn't there some way to bring them together? I believe so. And I think there is often more sense to our emotions than we sometimes realize. I put a lot of faith in mine!
hm, i think you're also very right rach. following my emotional self is like following my gut. plus, is my emotional self is misrable then something is terribly wrong. my emotional self drives me to better things in the end.
(i've given up waiting and am off to the old maids club...)
oh melinda, you're so not. you haven't even made it to a year yet! timing is everything. he was only kidding about your return.
if not we can be old maids together in napanee.
frig you're not old.
I missed you too! Major insanity lately, you wouldn't believe it all even if I told you.... I am here this weekend - when are you free??
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